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Tuesday, June 2, 2009

The Parenthood Roller Coaster

One of my all time favorite movies is Parenthood. I probably watched it over and over when I was far too young to watch or understand that type of material. Okay, we'll pretend I was far too young. One of my favorite parts of the movie is when Mary Steinbergen's character equates Life to a roller coaster. She loves the ride, her husband, not so much. Then toward the end of the movie you watch Steve Martin start on one of the downward slopes. He thinks he can't enjoy the ride only to realize once you relax it's kind of fun.

One of my roller coaster worthy moments came when we found out Arleigh was Super Citizen again. Life doesn't get any better than to celebrate the achievements of your child! Right? What if it comes at the expense of a sibling's self esteem? How do you celebrate one child while commiserating with the other?

Hanan was crushed every month when she didn't get that award. Part of me wanted to write the teacher a note and plead her case. I knew that wasn't the answer. I wanted Hanan to get the award without any doubt that she deserved it. With each character trait being honored I thought about Hanan's class. I wondered if the right child was chosen. There were definitely months when Hanan was probably not the best choice. There were other months when I was shocked at the choice. I always chalked it up to the fact that I'm not in the classroom every second of every day and not every child can be picked. It sucks to see your kid get hurt. Each month she got over it pretty quickly until it's the last month and Arleigh won for a second time this year. That realization hit that she wasn't going to be a Super Citizen in her first grade year and she was crushed. She got over it. She was sad and hurt but she didn't blame anyone. (like her mother would have) She will try again next year. I hurt for her as she sadly watched Arleigh get attention and she tried so hard to congratulate her sister. I know how she feels.

In the ups and downs of the roller coaster that we've been on for the past 9 or so months, this barely registers as a hill. Hanan is moving on. They are both going to get an award for their P.E. class that includes a scholarship for Tai Kwon Do class. (I realize this is the martial arts school's way of getting me to sign them up. I'm still a proud Mama!) Hanan picks herself up and dusts herself off pretty easily. I'm worried that Arleigh is setting herself up for a pretty big fall the first time she's not the one to get the prize. I don't worry too much though. She has her Daddy, her sisters and a Mama Bear to help her back up. She'll be fine.

I used to recite Phillipians 4:13. "I can do all things through him that strengthens me." I have come to a realization in the last few months that I'm not meant to do all things. Maybe it's I'm not meant to receive all things? Instead I choose to focus on this verse...“No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him (1 Corinthians 2:9).” I'll ride the roller coaster blind and see where the ride ends.

1 comment:

The Driskells said...

Thanks for sharing your mom struggles and for reminding me to enjoy the ride!

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